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Not a media bias critique at all. That's a total The Onion-style headline.

Phoenix New Times? Is that what The Onion is calling themselves these days?

Close—Biden was elected because he was a white guy who wasn't Trump.

Correct, the numbers definitely kept dropping through August and beyond.

The only way Trump will lose any influence is when he dies, and even then it won't be by much, because his syphilitic ramblings will be compiled into a tome akin to holy scriptures, and that will posthumously guide MAGA, which at that point will led by Cocaine Donnie, the only other personality red hats adore.

Further to this point ...

You sure the withdrawal wasn't in June? That's when it seems to have started for him.

What did Biden do in the August of his first time? Not easily googlable.

Fighting men who think won’t turn on their countrymen. It takes fighting men who can’t think to do that.

I don’t have 55 minutes. What’s the gist?

As if 45 runs in three games weren’t remarkable enough!

And then if it did go right past his house, he’d complain about the noise.

It looks like Holton is getting beat more on four of his five top pitches: four-seamer, cutter, sweeper, change. Only the sinker is as effective this year as last year. One big problem might be that he’s leaving more meatballs in the middle of the plate, 8.1% this year versus 5.8% last year. I also wonder whether his arm angle drop is affecting how batters see his pitches? Down to 41% this year from 43% last year and 46% in 2023. Doesn’t sound like a lot, but maybe the batters sense a big difference?

Hank Hill living in woke Arlen in 2025 is an interesting twist.

I don’t think it’s black guys they’re avoiding giving the award … 😏 https://www.freep.com/story/sports/mlb/tigers/2025/08/05/zach-mckinstry-detroit-tigers-winner-heart-and-hustle-award/85525327007/ 2010: Brandon Inge. 2011: Alex Avila. 2012: Austin Jackson. 2013: Don Kelly. 2014: Don Kelly. 2015: James McCann. 2016: Ian Kinsler. 2017: Ian Kinsler. 2018: JaCoby Jones. 2019: Niko Goodrum. 2021: Robbie Grossman. 2022: Eric Haase. 2023: Matt Vierling. 2024: Riley Greene. And now … Zach in 2025.

This makes a bit of sense. It’s probably not decision time quite yet, but the tea leaves seem to indicate the owners may have the upper hand in this negotiation, and salary suppression may be an outcome in the agreement. Flip side, Skubal’s market may not be as big before the CBA as they would hope, as many teams themselves may want the certainty of knowing what the new agreement looks like before they seek out a high-priced player, even a super stud.

Same with the anti A.J. “Smartest Guy in the Room” Hinch fans. They want Daddy to come home from going out for a pack of cigarettes.

Bummer, dude.

Andy respects Dan so he stays on point when he works with him. With Benetti, he can be looser and riff about pop culture and stuff.

Notice on that replay how, on the Jahmai Jones throw to the plate, which would have been a perfect strike on a contested play, Jake knew the runner on third was not contesting it, so he moved out from behind the plate and cut off the throw in front chest high to put himself in a better position to make a play on the runners if he needed to? It's a super low percentage chance anything would happen, but he did it anyway. #GameWithinTheGame

Ooh McKinstry error on an easy ground ball. Dog days of the season bit him but hard.

I think we are well into the post-Congressional-Reps-Represent-The-People era.

Jesse Watters absolutely understands the Republicans drew that map.

Is Benetti calling an Ohio State preseason practice game for FanDuel Columbus or something?

I would not object to at-large representative by state on principle, but man, would that ever make election day a mess for voters, especially in big states. Plus, they would have to overturn the The Uniform Congressional District Act that stipulates that representatives must be elected from geographical districts, and that these must be single-member districts.